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"If you play games and wait to get back to him, he may have already run off into the sunset with someone else," says Spira.

You need to show your interest right away; in the world of online dating you never know how many women one man has contacted, and how quickly the others may express their interest.

This is likely because an initial message serves mostly to make your profile available to the other person.

To do that, "talk about yourself in anecdotes," says Gonzaga.Exchanging two or three e-mails is a good way to get a sense of each other's personality.After that, have a phone conversation—trade cell phone numbers, never home numbers."Your primary photo should be all about you." She recommends posting between three to five photos only—any more and "it's as if you're already smothering your future partner." Also, be sure to include a shot where you can see your body.It doesn't have to be provocative (and you most certainly do not have to have a perfect figure!

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